Alfred Alfer Kills Himself
by Darfur Maxx
Summary: Arthur Read falls into a manic-depressive spiral over worshiping a racist cartoonist to the based beats of "Crazy Bus".
1. I will always suffer

Arthur had never considered himself a monster, and felt justified in his life choices. Nobody ever really took him seriously. Not his family, not his friends. Not a single soul in Elwood. They may love him, and care for him, but when it came down to it, he knew that he was just a prop to make the Read family look good.

So why take himself seriously? What, exactly, was the point?

Why do so, when he can indulge in his passion.

He took out his Google Pixel 2 and went onto YouTube. He shifted through his recommended list full of slutty white girl dancing videos and David Duke tributes, until he found his favourite video, _Emily Youcis Fucks Shitlib Feminazi Mary the Moo Cow With a Red MAGA-themed Bad Dragon Strap-on Dildo (GONE SEXUAL)_. His parents had no clue about his recently acquired tastes in music and political views, or else they would've never allowed him to have his brand new Google Pixel 2 right in the palm of his hand. He could feel his hand getting greasy already, just from holding his phone. Suddenly, the all too familiar Crazy Bus theme started playing from his phone. He set the phone on the table, using one of those plastic animal thingies that helps prop up your phone on it.

Then he began his daily Crazy Bus twerk sesh. He had learned to gyrate every time Mary the Moo Cow coughs up her own bile, and to bring 'dat ass up and down whenever the demented, grinning Alt-Right rapist's jugs bounced, or whenever she spoke in German or Korean. Arthur never understood the teasing and bullying that all his peers gave him, having stopped considering them as friends a long time ago. Of course he wasn't gay. He's not Binky, after all. Now Binky's a real gay, with real gay passions (he likes reading the Twilight novels while listening to Paul Lekakis while wearing his stylish black leggings on a Sunday morning, just to give an example.)

Arthur, however, was different. He was born different. He was born a twerking machine.

If only D.W. took him seriously . . .

* * *

hEY KIDS!

Kidders!

It's finally time, I repeat, it is FINALLY TIME!

When u gotta get that nut but you cant gt itoh fuck I MISSED

meeeeeeee :( :( :(

facefullofpiss  
facefullofpissfacefullofpiss  
facefullofpissfacefullofpissfacefullofpiss  
facefullofpissfacefullofpissfacefullofpiss

facefullofpiss murderface . jpg facefullofpiss

facefullofpissfacefullofpissfacefullofpiss  
facefullofpissfacefullofpissfacefullofpiss  
facefullofpissfacefullofpiss  
facefullofpiss

v-the gun-v

bengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearth  
bengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearth  
bengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearth  
bengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearth  
bengunninmiddleearth

bengunninmiddleearth  
bengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearth  
bengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearth  
bengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearth  
bengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearthbengunninmiddleearth

HOW THE FUCK DID I MISS!

GODDAMMIT!

 _kay u guys, You probly wont read this, but just incase anyone wants to, It's part one of this script I wrote in Mr Nawa's class starMr Nawa's class staring PD and Alfred. Actually, PD's original name was Phat Dawg when I created him a long time ago, bu_

 _kay u guys, You probly wont read anyone wants to, It's part one of this script I wrote in Mr Nawa's class staring PD and Alfred. Actually, PD's original naAlfred. Actually, PD's original PD's original name was Phat Dawg when I created him a long time ago, bu_

 _fucking crap i mddid not mean to do this!_

heyy friends!

Remembe when the Arthur section was bout arthur turning into a retard instead of a roboted retard four year old SEX GOD?

wait fucki remember now i dont live in this world.

.

never

ever

have

.

 _HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY GUYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYSSSSSSSSS WATS GOIN DOOOOOOWN._

"One day, Arthur woke up. `I am Arthur,` said Arthur, destroyer of canon and raper of Phat Dawg, `don'ttouch my penis it is asexual and only responds t Usher AND NOT USHIO SO FUCK YOU DARFUR MAXX YOU BIRDASS RENIGGER!`"

hAHA I DIDN'T EVEN MENTION TRAVIS OF COURSE IN MATTER OF FUCKING ASS HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA no it's no a paody

"Arthur decides that he really super fucking hated D.W. because she is a brat and broke his penis- I MEANT PLANE JESUSS FUCKIGN GOD! hE broke his PLANENIS and stabbed Pal's butthole."

Haha not good enough for you, huh? Not good enough for even a fucing spamHUHYHUUH?/?

 _I love carpet. . . . i love desk. . . . I love lamp... .I love lamp._

Too ba they'll never love me :')

"Arthur murdered D.W. as well as all of the other animal people and has become a Bionic Bunny villian, except Alt-Right and severely depressed. Nobody will ever love him or want to be his friend."

Just like Alfred Alfer.

The pistachio dog that sometimes shows up in the kancolle browser game when you keep poking damaged Ryuujou. Not the one created by that UN-liberal SHITHEAD TRAITOR TO TUMBLR.

IN FACT LET'S FIND OUT WHAT KIND OF MEAN THINGS PEEPPOLES ARE A SAYIN YAAAAASSSSSSSUHHHH!

I WILL TYPEP IN THTESE MAGIC WORDS OF BITCH INTO google:

# 1 "emily youcis racist scumfuck"

The first result, I mean VERY FIRST FUCKING RESULT IS FROM /POL/ GOD FUCK

tfw your livestream gets better after they build a wall  
Anonymous ID:2dZM132G Sun 29 Jan 2017 02:34:49 No.109718233 Report

109717848

Good, thanks to her, you are no longer white.

Anonymous ID:RqCOF60b Sun 29 Jan 2017 02:32:46 No.109717835 Report

this cunt's voice is really disturbing

Anonymous ID:Krk8Opqt Sun 29 Jan 2017 02:36:16 No.109718505 Report

Quoted By: 109718850

THE QT EMILY YOUCIS

EMILY YOUCIS IS HERE

Anonymous ID:dLsy2sZ+ Sun 29 Jan 2017 02:37:01 No.109718654 Report

Oh thanks bitch now i need to masturbate.

Anonymous ID:f+kJUeve Sun 29 Jan 2017 02:37:02 No.109718656 Report

Quoted By: 109718769

that moaning

Anonymous ID:lKG2f2f5 Sun 29 Jan 2017 02:37:28 No.109718745 Report

109718584

Fuck that shill. I rather do it with the qt tinygirl

Anonymous ID:qabRlgiQ Sun 29 Jan 2017 02:38:39 No.109718944 Report

109718420

The loopfu said "goodbye" last time... Maybe she won't come back

muslim-ish kids trying to redpill

...

Go allahu ackbar yourselves

Anonymous ID:95FUBYDF Sun 29 Jan 2017 02:38:46 No.109718959 Report

COME BACK GLASSES GIRL.

TELL US LIKE THAT AGAIN

Anonymous ID:zYFdAot2 Sun 29 Jan 2017 02:40:51 No.109719343 Report

109719162

Sam Hyde came and destroyed the stream so bad they altered the format.

Anonymous ID:vrNgkyaq Sun 29 Jan 2017 02:40:53 No.109719345 Report

109717118

That fucking jew is there again in the background with another sign.

REEEEE KILL THE SCUM

Anonymous ID:sKe7mXAF Sun 29 Jan 2017 02:40:57 No.109719348 Report

109719121

I cant tell if that's Youcis or Venti

Anonymous ID:NV+jUki5 Sun 29 Jan 2017 02:45:19 No.109720068 Report

this bitch again? fuck off already dumb cunt

Anonymous ID:uP9tzmOr Sun 29 Jan 2017 02:45:39 No.109720125 Report

109720024

pack of sandniggers will descend upon her and rape her

Anonymous ID:G3VLLH/x Sun 29 Jan 2017 02:45:41 No.109720126 Report

Quoted By: 109720398

so wait, they set up a queue now?

Anonymous ID:ppVCCF7H Sun 29 Jan 2017 03:00:01 No.109722557 Report

She'll be redpilled before long lads.

 **AWWW POOR BABY!**


	2. Fargoth is a pedophile

_"I saw your dumb ass on the MAGfest 2016 panel and I asked myself "Who is this annoying cunt who just invited herself on the panel when everyone there looks like they want to punch her fucking teeth down her throat?" Then someone told me your name. I decided to check your channel out to see exactly what such a vile annoying cunt could produce and I wasn't surprised in the least when I entered your name in the search bar then hit 'Enter' and found myself knee deep in shit. Nothing but fucking shit. You suck. You have no talent. You have no redeemable qualities. You're fat. You look like you have alcohol fetal syndrome. Your animation is absolute dog shit to the tenth fucking degree. Kill yourself you retarded bitch."_

George Soros, Final Fantasy XV.

 _"Show me those big tits"_

Arthur Read to his mom and later to Binky Barnes during some deleted scenes in "Arthur's Big Hit".

* * *

"You are a neo-nazi faggot."

Oh. Well that isn't kosher you little fucker.

It was only then that Alfred realized just how insignificant his penis was becoming. It was eight inches fat, and yet couldn't even appease a thirsty hound dog.

That's what the boys down at the country club said to him, anyway.

"Boy I will fuck your cuckass up." The gay Swedish-Korean lobotomist Alt-Right big breast aficionado neo-nazi faggot dog said, with all the gumption of a nullo eunuch pedophile taking morphine down at the cracker factory.

"Lawl, you're gay," said Miss Anita Minx Youcis or whatever her name was, "by the way, I have three vaginas with a nineteen inch vibrating dragon dildo inserted in my middle vagina, in fact, I call it my `Krispy Kreme™`."

"By 'da nine divines!" said Fargoth, Texas Ranger. "Y'all niggas gon' hav' yas'selves uh' race war! I can' allow 'dat shit!"

The gay chomo from Seyda Neen leaped into action, just as the ANTIFA training camp in Syria had shown him, throttling the white supremacist dog with his shoulder.

The Single Asian ANTIFA Female girl (GORL) ran away, because she was raised on Lifetime movies and Adderall and therefore cannot participate in fight scenes between two men. Two very, very closeted, horny, men.

One of which is actually a dog.

Intense, melodramatic descriptions of well co-ordinated daytime TV violence were had as the two fucke- uh, I mean fought each other. It was exciting and stuff. One of them even gets hit in the balls!

"Ow that hurt very badly." Alfred moaned like a lobotomized, retarded zebra frottaging a paraplegic lion.

He hit Fargoth in the balls as well as in the nose, and he hit his nose so hard that he pushed Fargoth's nose bones into his brain, killing him instantly.

Alfred stood in triumph over the slain law enforcer, like the white trash ghetto holy warrior that he truly is. He took out a bowie knife and cut through his Class 4 Kevlar vest as well as the Vvardenfell chitin armour layered underneath.

Nothing left to say. A total eclipse of the heart.

* * *

Arthur Read saw the whole ordeal on his Google Pixel 2. He had postponed his daily twerk sesh' to check up on his ol' pal Alfred Alfer. Because he knows and likes Alfred as an apolitical friend, for unlike CERTAIN OTHER PEOPLE, he does not stare at his feet or genitals or keep trying to invite him to a bathhouse and/or communist weddings. He knows that he is straight and has feelings only for David Duke and Sam Hyde, like a normal fucking human being. Then, as the video progressed, and Alfred started pulling out the wood elf's heart from his chest cavity, something clicked. Before he knew it, he was reaching for his iPod touch and his yellow coloured Bose SoundLink Color Bluetooth Speaker II.

This felt like the right thing to do. Celebrate his friend's victory while he devours the prick's heart, by shaking and gyrating his ass more fiercely than a starving stripper.

 _Crazy bus, crazy bus,_

 _Riding on the crazy bus_

 _Riding up, riding down,_

 _Driven by a funny clown_

 _Wacky goony, goofy, spoony_

 _High as a plane or a balloon-y_

 _Crazy bus, come with us,_

 _As we ride, ride, ride, ride, ride_

 _It's a crazy bus, not a schmazy bus,_

 _Don't make a fuss, just come with us_

 _Sloppy, sloopy, gloppy, gloopy,_

 _Happy-happy, hoopy-hoopy,_

 _Dopey, doffy, screwy, blue-y_

 _Gooey, chewy, fooey, dewey_

 _Absolutely bus-a-looey_

 _Crazy, lazy, crazy, crazy bus!_


	3. I'm quite depressed, I'm quite a mess

_"IT's not the gender or body you feel ashamed of, it is the perceptions others have told you to have about the female gender and body. [...] to be honest your issues make me think you were sexually abused somehow."_

* * *

"Don't touch me, you bitch!" Arthur screamed as he ran down the street. He was about to turn the corner when Molly caught up with him and grabbed him by the head.

"Arthur, what the _hell_ , man?" Molly had Arthur in a headlock, exasperated beyond belief as she tightened her grip around his throat. "Just what the hell's wrong with you!? _Why'd you do that to Binky!?_ "

"UUUuuuuuuuggkkkh . . . fuckin' . . . fuckin' cuckold SHIT LIB' . . . fuck 'dat faggot **fuck!** " The aardvark writhed in sheer anger, trying to fight her off. She's never seen him even remotely this angry before, much less expect him to stab Binky Barnes right in the jugular vein with a sharpened _Shezow_ keychain.

"He's never done anything to you! Nothing that's anywhere near as horrible as STABBING HIM!" She found herself slamming her fist into Arthur's face, as if it was an old habit. She broke his glasses, disfiguring the frame and cracking one of the lens. It did little more than piss him off even more. "Because of you, he's in critical condition! The doctors said he might not make it!"

"I told you _not to touch me!_ "

"Damn you, Arthur!"

Another punch connected with his face, hitting him in the nose. It wasn't enough to break it. It wasn't enough to break him. Arthur had managed to reach for her hair and immediately grabbed on to it. He growled as he used all his strength to rip out chunks of her hair as she tried to punch him again. She screamed as he inflicted damage, and her grip loosened just a little.

It just wasn't enough.

She knew Arthur would use this chance to try to break her hold on him, and technically, he did manage to break it. But on her terms, instead of his. "HYAAAAAAAAAAH!" She suddenly threw the writhing aardvark down on the asphalt road.

"Aaaaahh!" He shrieked in pain. The shock of the impact spread throughout his body, especially towards the back of his head. The pain almost burned through all his energy, and for those agonizing few seconds, all he could do was look up at his assailant.

And her boot stomping his head one last time.

* * *

I could never stand you.

You make me sick.

Disgusting.

Always hurting me

I feel sick of it.

You are

Disgusting.

You have

No clue how much

I hate you.

No idea whatsoever.

You are disgusting.

I will always hate you.

Don't laugh

It's not funny.

IT'S NOT FUNNY.

You never change

You don't even try.

You stopped trying.

Stopped reaching for the top.

Stopped caring about yourself.

There is no greater torment

Than you, yourself.

There is none more oppressive

Than you, yourself.

Disgusting.

Your desires disgust

Your sexuality disgusts

Your sisters made you disgusting.

But you could have changed.

You didn't.

Now all I have left

Is sadness. Is anger.

Pity. Angst. Guilt.

Fear.

The more you keep away

From these personal feelings

The more I find something

To destroy myself with.

All out of disgust.

Disgust for my own self.

* * *

 _"I dont want to become something else. I've been kind of seeing this too. It's freaking me out a little and I dont know if i'm just washed up becasue i'm not in my prime anymore or I'm becoming an adult. But never will I loose my innocence and spirit as I get older - i'm going to fight that till I die. [...] I felt depressed and washed up as ever. I dont really know how to do what I like anymore, i dont know what i like. The boundary has left between what i like and what other people want to see. I'm trying to stay true to a character i made yet also expand upon it."_


	4. Skinny dipping with Emily Youcis

Arthur and them goes to a pool that has no bathing suit rule. Because that pool is for skinny dipping. As in swims in the nude. Will say butt, penis, scrotum, vagina, and clitris in it (but not clitoris of course.) They might be children but still no bathing suits allowed. And they all know it. They have no problems with it. They already know what them parts are. They have no problems not covering themselves up. They entered that pool and is undressing now. They are in the locker rooms right now.

"We are ready now," said Arthur, "How does my penis look?"

"We sure are," said Buster, "Your penis is perfect same as your scrotum."

"We can tell you have balls," said Brain, Or should i say testicles."

"Look at my big penis," said Bud, "It is long after all i call it long thing."

"It sure is big," said Arthur, "Now Brain's is average like mine."

They all came out as naked as the day they was born. Bud see's D.W.,s vagina and nice and smooth front for the first time. She likes what she see's on Bud. She came over to him and touched it and he didn't mind at all. They are having fun while being naked. Francine likes Arthur's best because his looks perfect. No flaws at all. It is circumcised so it can be washed better. She thinks uncircumcised penises looks bad. Do to the puckered end to them. She is talking to him now about it.

"You look good naked," said Francine, "Them genitals of you are nice and perfect."

"DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME YOU LIBTARD BITCH!" Said Arthur.

Arthur started to strangle Francine while holding her underwater. The other kids didn't notice or care about this and kept touching each others' genitals and probably each others' feet, because that's what Travis' robot child prostitutes like to do, even more than watching _Mary Moo Cow_ or _Peppa Pig_. Francine will die of course. Arthur always hated her in matter of fact. He hates all of his former friends now. He had faked his own death to Molly just so he could kill all his other friends, for being pozzed, white people hating, pedophile accepting liberal mouthpieces. Francine floated up to the surface of the water like a corpse and stayed like that. Nobody cared because she did not have a penis, even so much as a below average sized one like George. Arthur swam to where D.W. was, who was still touching professional child porn star Bud Compson's amazingly big and long penis. It was even bigger than Ron Jeremy's, and he's only four. Which is why everyone in Elwood City watches and masturbates to his JOI (read: Jack Off Instruction) videos that his mother posts daily on Motherless and Xhamster. He immediately punched her a bunch of times in the back of the head, giving her terminal brain damage while inadvertently castrating Bud's penis with his violent actions. He laughed maniacally at what he just did to his bratty baby sister's stupid cocksucking face.

"Bud's penis is gone," said D.W., "he is castrated now, which is a man without a penis of course."

"Bud is now castrated," said Fern, "I am glad he no longer has a penis now."

"I am glad I am watching you eight year old kids," said Travis, "I have lots of good fun watching kids cutting off their penises with their teeth of course."

"Hello Arthur I have heard your prayers and watched all your twerk videos on YouTube of course," said Alfred Alfer, "by the way, you have nice looking feet."

"Time to shoot some Jew niggers in this pool now," said Emily Youcis, "I lost 2134812732986184812468012460812 lbs this year just so I can shoot gay Hebrew child porn star niggers in a pool with an automatic rifle one of my boyfriends bought for me of course."

Emily shot everybody other than Alfred or Arthur in the head in about five seconds. Even Francine of course even though she was already dead. Arthur left the pool with his new mommy and brother/lord and saviour. He became a regular speaker on the Daily Stormer and Infowars and later convinced Sam Hyde, President Donald Trump, and David Duke to become nullos, which are eunuchs without any penises, testicles, or even prostates or nipples. To prevent them from touching a boy's parts and turning gay of course in matter of fact. See what happens next chapter of this good public nudity and YouTube Alt-Right twerking story of course.


	5. Mike The Creeper

"The term eunuch generally refers to a man who has been castrated, typically early enough in his life for this change to have major hormonal consequences. In Latin, the words eunuchus, spado and castratus were used to denote eunuchs."

Arthur was reading the Wikipedia article on eunuchs on his Google Pixel 2 out loud while sipping his strawberry margarita out of a straw, strewn out on a lawn chair by the pool. Life has been kind of him ever since he murdered all his best friends and disowned his parents, before running away with his new family. His new family consisted of a twenty-seven year old white supremacist journalist and animator, and a fictional, yet somehow corporeal, emotionally-disturbed, Dissociative-Identity-Disorder inflicted cartoon dog, both of which told him that they love him very much, and not just for his twerking videos. They had taken him to their summer home in Seoul, South Korea to avoid persecution by the U.S. authorities for their actions. As he read through the article, he started to feel uneasy. It was a subtle dread at first, and he tried to ignore it. He thought that it was just the subject matter that he was reading to himself. It reminded him of the awful stench of cigarettes, and the man that used to be all of the Elwood kids' "uncle"; he was quite fond of eunuchs, as well as circumcision and Baptism, and he was all too happy to announce this whenever he had half the chance.

"During the Yuan Dynasty, eunuchs became a desirable commodity for tributes, and dog bites were replaced by more sophisticated surgical techniques. During the period when Korea was subjected to the Mongol Empire, the Korean kings regularly sent `human tributes` to their overlords, sending hundreds of teenage Korean girls to serve as concubines to the Yuan Emperors of China, while hundreds of teenage Korean boys were castrated and then sent to serve as eunuchs at the Chinese court once every three years. Korean sources only record the names of Korean aristocrats sent to China as a `human tribute` to work as either eunuchs and concubines, but there were thousands more commoners who were rounded up to serve whom the Korean sources mention only in-"

That was when, in his peripheral vision, Arthur saw someone. It was an old white man, wearing a black baseball cap with the image of an eagle's head over a heart-shaped American flag, a long-sleeved burgundy shirt, dark jeans, and worn-looking grey sneakers. He wore glasses, just like Arthur.

He was right in front of him. Waving at him with his right hand.

"Hey boy." He said in a gruff, chain-smoking southern accent.

"Who are you? Wait, why are you even here!?" Startling could not even begin to describe the sudden shift in mood upon discovering this creeper standing before him.

"My name's Mike. I'm going to take you back home."

"Like _hell_ you're gonna take me back anywhere!" Arthur yelled out. He switched to the camera app on his phone and immediately started recording the old man.

"Hi guys, Arthur here! So I was just sitting here at home, minding my own business, when this creepy old man just standing in front of me came out of nowhere! You know you're breaking the law, right? You can't just barge in on private property uninvited!"

Mike shook his head and tried to cover his face. "That's a damn lie, this boy here is my nephew and he needs to come home with me immediately. He's been brainwashed by that dumb racist crazy bitch that got fired from working at the Philly Stadium a year ago!"

" _Nephew!?_ I don't even fucking know you! You're not even an aardvark, you fucking creeper!"

The old man shook his head and then tried to grab Arthur's phone, but he rolled off of the lawn chair and scrambled to his feet, still recording as much of the creeper as he can. "And don't you fucking DARE try to touch me, you sick ass pedophile!"

"I'm starting to get _mad_ boy," Mike said with a sneer, "don't make me whip out my belt!"

Arthur started backing away from Mike, trying to move towards his house. "Want me to call the cops on you? 'Cause I'm sure they'd **love** to hear about a dirty old man that came up and started beating and kidnapping an eight year old kid, for no reason!"

"You're coming back home, one way or another, boy! Your parents sent me to rescue you from that Emily Yaw-ris cunt!"

"I don't need any rescuing, except from YOU!"

Arthur turned and ran to his house, rushing through the open glass door and shutting it. He locked it a split second later. Mike had not moved from his spot, he just watched Arthur through the glass door, and pulled out his own phone. Arthur closed the curtains on Mike. His phone was still recording, and Arthur moved throughout the house to lock all the doors and windows that he could, with panic filling his stomach.

"He's got me trapped inside of my house," he said to his phone, "oh god, what if he's calling someone to come help him!?"

Despite his earlier threat, Arthur could not, in fact, call the police on this man. The reason for this is that Arthur is a known fugitive wanted by Interpol for multiple counts of murder, inciting racial hatred on an international scale, and evading justice from his home country, as well from every other compliant law enforcement agency in the democratic world. Emily and Alfred had discussed this with him extensively, ever since the pool incident. Technically, he shouldn't even be recording videos of himself at home. He only did so as a scare tactic.

"Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap, oh crap oh crap!"

He huddled in the corner of his bedroom, while the phone was still taking footage, albeit inside the pocket of his swimming trunks. He had his options, but he was too far gone in the heat of the moment to consider most of them. He saw only one path; one way to choose. Why talk it out? Why waste time reaching out to his so-called "family"? They were hustlers from the start, just like his real parents. He'd either end up leading them into a trap and bringing utter shame to himself, or they would drop him like the sack of crap that he is. That was what D.W. started calling him, shortly before he left. In truth, in his adrenaline-warped mind, within the horror he had gladly called his life, up until now, there was only one answer to it all.

It was his rifle, pointed under his chin; locked, loaded, and ready to go.

He had to end it all. Mike was probably calling people to help kidnap him. He probably called the government. The police. He knew who he was; everybody did. Of course they would side with the creeper. He would be made an example of, just like they did with Andrew Breitbart. They wouldn't even have to be subtle about it, this time. A simple show of force, and the resulting, solemn lip-service portrayed over the media, drenched in the most unbearable amount of self-masturbatory justice ever depicted. Loads of comments from spectators, each with their own unique mind-sets; all of which lead to the same conclusion:

Disdain, disgust, and **pity.**

A sad, broken child, devoid of even the most faint traces of any sort of respect. An acceptable target. An evil motherfucker. A homewrecker who just couldn't keep it in his pants, and not put it on a public video-sharing website like YouTube. He would become the butt of jokes; even in death.

He had to end it all, hastily. Quickly.

Now.

But-

He can't. He just can't bring himself to do it.

That's what D.W. would expect. That's what she ultimately wanted from him. His abject, total defeat.

He can't give in. Not now.

Arthur moved his foot off the trigger, and rose to his feet. He started whispering to himself. "This is my rifle," the cold barrel of the gun slid out from his chin, "this is my gun." He hoisted it into shooting position, just like Emily showed him. "This is my life, and this is for fun."

He repeated the song lyrics to himself over and over, as he made his way around back to where he first saw the creeper motherfucker. Mike picked on the wrong fucking aardvark. He'll be the last kid that he'll _ever_ see, and for good reason. He reached the dining room, where he first came in. He heard a strange sound, it sounded a little like a burglar prying the door of a locked glass refrigerator, with a crowbar. Arthur watched from around the corner, the rifle aimed towards the glass doors, with his finger wrapped around the trigger.

The glass doors opened suddenly, and Arthur saw a black hat and the distinct rims of worn glasses.

" **I TOLD YOU NOT TO TOUCH ME!-!-!** "


End file.
